The Lobster Pity Pot
Josie Martin -- September 1, 2006
Oh... some times are just like that. I was going to send my "How to Eat a Lobster" piece to Gourmet Magazine. I was hopeful because right after I finished writing it, I discovered they had a special supplement of short stories in their August issue. "The most exciting project we have ever worked on at Gourmet", according to Ruth Reichl, its editor.
A small booklet that fit tidily inside the pages of the complicated and Lucullan recipes of that august magazine.
Boy Was I excited! Reichl went on to say that all the stories were about food, "but that if you looked beneath the surface, you'd find that they are really about identity, culture, politics, and love..." Caramba!
Josie Martin
Perfect Just like my story about discovering the secrets of devouring lobsters, the magic of Maine with its craggy coast, its laconic lobster-eating denizens, and all its charms.
And so I went on the internet to get the information that for some mysterious reason doesn't appear on their masthead - like their address probably in New York, or even their website. It took me half an hour just to locate it! Weird names, titles, and appelations kept popping up like Epicurious, Savvy, Cuisine, Saveur, and Bon Appetit. After a lot of clicks and double duds, I called to my in-house guru who also appears as husband, wit, and fixer extraordinaire when I need him.
Finally we got to our destination, Gourmet. All this took much longer than it takes to crack a lobster shell and dig into its lusciousness. While trying to locate: "submission information", the screen kept flashing recipes, menus, kitchens, wine, sugar'n spice (or was it sugar-tits?) and I am not making this up, gospel of grub. It took longer than shucking a whole bushel of corn and making a blueberry pie. I got bored, I turned to the last story in the supplement, the only one I hadn't read.
Oh NO! The last, the very last piece was about... Maine: Swan Island, my lobsters and the man who cooked them. Mine, Mine, Mine!
Some stories are just like that, you write them and your writing group says they're good and you rewrite them, and you show them to your sister-in-law, and you add or subtract a tail here, a little butter in the middle, a pincer there.
And somebody else, one Cynthia Zarin has done it already... and maybe better... smarter, or just faster. Maybe she...
Never Mind, just hand me the lobster pity-pot.