Starbucks: Bruhaha, or Brew Ha, Ha
Shelly Lowenkopf -- October 7, 2005
Shelly Lowenkopf, raconteur, writer, editor, and man-about-the-literary-town, offers his opinions on Santa Barbara coffee houses: those things you wish somebody would say to the establishments who flunk the quality test. We report, you decide.
There are those of us who feel as strongly negative about Starbucks as Steve Beisner feels about Windows PCs or, indeed, any Microsoft Product. Many of us are resolute in our belief that the mere presence of Starbucks is a compelling argument against the notion of Intelligent Design.
In our informed and hard-come-by wisdom, we prefer Peet's (3905 State Street), but not just the coffee roasted and ground by Peet's, instead the coffee subsequently prepared and served at the only Peet's venue in Santa Barbara. Although Peet's is not known for its writerly ambience during the morning rush, there is a distinct laissez faire during the midmorning and later afternoon hours, offering a chance for reflection, revision, and the sense of being away from the place where we normally work.
Truth to tell, if our stall showers were wi-fi sensitive, we'd probably spend more time there because showers are traditionally places where ideas emerge. If Peet's had stall showers as well as a superb coffee, we might never leave.
Somehow, we find, Janine's, who serves Peet's coffee, manages to screw it up. Possibly it is an attitude thing. The Peet's coffee brewed and served in the Coast Village Janine's or, for that matter, in the foyer of Gelson's Market, has a rancid, over-the-top flavor that seems to leave a slight residue of gunk on the tongue and does nothing to improve our quest for the mot juste or our ability to deal with near-miss rejection letters. Even the Von's markets with Peet's adjuncts are--well; at heart, they're still Von's, a place we associate with niggardly wages and an overwhelming attitude that the customer may always be right but is also always in the way.
Janine's is not a writer-friendly venue, nor is any place whose denizens wear $250 tennis togs or enough neck chains to set off the alarms at LAX. Some of us go unabashedly to coffee shops to eavesdrop, ever hopeful of some dialogue that will set us off on a tsunami of ideas and the hidden agendas of our characters. But just try eavesdropping at Janine's. Ah, no, thank you. We brothers and sisters of the rejection slip are less impressed by the state of the real estate market or how much a set of four new tires for the SUV cost or, indeed, strategies for maneuvering said SUV through the Montecito War Zone with one hand while communicating with the stock broker on the cell phone. We want a grittier eavesdrop.
As writers we very much like the spirit of the independent coffee house, and Peet's seems to have the intent of the Founding Coffee Fathers in mind.
In what may have the sound of hubris, there are those of us who believe we can take the blindfolded writing test and distinguish prose written in independent coffee houses from Starbuck's text. Vanity of vanities, all is latte.
For those who prefer the independent coffee venue there is www.Delocator.net. Clicking in to Delocator, one is presented with a simple page which will reward the seeker with a list of independent coffee houses within five miles of most postal zip codes.
Independent coffee houses or Starbucks? Blue states or red? Q.E.D.

